What the Diaper Family is reading...

I've gotten some requests from others moms as to what we read in our home. Mowgli is a very imaginative fellow, as you've no doubt learned by now, and it can be tricky to keep his interest sometimes. One day he's totally into reptiles; the next robots, you get the idea. So, books are a big, big part of life for us. We read the bible with him every night, he reads books on his own (though he can't actually read yet- but he enjoys the pictures and remembers the words on some pages almost perfectly) during quiet time, we read together at the library (we visit weekly on Fridays) and at home.

Another favorite of his (and mine) are audio books. This can be an excellent alternative to watching TV and also can help with the development of the imagination and increase the attention span. I will often sit down in my office to do some work, and set up a book on cd for Mowgli to listen and 'work' (this can be in the form of coloring, cutting paper, drawing, painting, working with clay- anything that requires sitting at a desk) along side me. The result? Mowgli is enjoying a great story and I ususally  buy myself at least 30 minutes to an hour of fairly peaceful time (that is if Pocahontas is asleep or otherwise entertained).

So- take a look at the ticker on the left side of the website for a lists of books that we are currently reading (I've included children's and adult books)

Enjoy this video of Mowgli reading to Pocahontas back when she was just a few months old.

Confessions of a 'naturalista'

Ok, so I'm all about cloth diapers (except when we travel- then we use g-diapers or disposables), I buy my beef from a local farm (we buy 1/4 to 1/2 cow at a time! But we still get cheese steaks from our local corner deli) We drink raw milk (sometimes- it's expensive) and I make my own baby food (except when someone gives me their leftover 50 jars of Gerber!) I use vinegar to clean my fridge and baking soda on  the drain (but Windex for the stainless appliances.) We drive a fuel efficient car (but I forget to turn the lights off all the time - much to Jake's dismay.)

You don't have to look very hard into my life to find inconsistencies all over the place. I'll admit it, I am neither perfect nor a purist about much. What works one day may not work another. Sometimes, what's on sale rules, other times, we sacrifice to make the wiser purchase. This 'flip-flopping' shows up in other areas of life too, not just what we buy or what we eat, but how we spend our time and how we run our home as well. In this highly politicized world where 'flip-floppers' are doomed to public ridicule, it feels Moms have to bend in all sorts of directions!good to confess! Granted, some of these flip flops are things I want to work on, places where I want to see growth and change in my life... others, are just a result of living a life so full that somethings spill over the edges and somethings can't always be the same.  Actually I prefer to think of myself as flexible (sounds more flattering doesn't it?) Life is dynamic and sometimes requires the flexibility of a Cirque du Soleil contortionist. We try to find what works, make the best choices that we can, and use what we have to the best of our ability. So, I'm ok with our inconsistencies... to me they just mean that 'my plan' doesn't rule my life.  Besides, the weather's getting really nice... definitely flip flop season!

Where do you flex, or flip flop?

About Us: The kind of kids you can't take to...

Fancy restaurants, the last minute workplace meeting scheduled on your "supposed" day off, uptight relatives' homes, etc.

Actually, I have brought my kids to 'those types of places' and endured the looks, sighs and 'polite' suggestions.

Loud, inquisitive, rambunctious, energetic, argumentative, strong-willed. Yes, I have those types of kids. And most days, I'm pretty glad about (albeit wiped out by) this reality.

3 feet in the air- as usualMy son, 5, (we'll call him 'Mowgli', since he has gorgeous shiny dark hair, and sometimes people think he was raised by wolves) struggles to not ask you about that weird mole on your face, jumps from the top step in our 10ft celing Colonial Revival, and uses words like Sarcophagus over dinner. Yes, I linked it; no need to be shown up by a 5 year old.  

 My daughter (we'll call her 'Pocahontas' since she's a free spirit), is decidedly a complete and utter people person; she wants no part of alone time or being put down for a nap (we do it anyway!). She never took a pacifier, blankie or any other type of outside comforter. She wants only to be with someone, in their arms, playing chase and jumping together. She will scream to high heaven if she isn't kindly invited to join you when you use the toilet.

So yes- I have those kind of kids, and probably, so do many of you. Good news! Those kind of kids, grow into those kind of adults- brilliant, daring, courageous, ambitious, caring and bold. But it takes lots of patience to see them as more than 'a handfull' sometimes. I have made it a goal to encourage moms and look for encouragement wherever it may be. So, in the grocery store, when a mom is struggling to parent well the child who is throwing a tantrum, I look at her. I'm sure you've been looked at before in the grocery store when your child is throwing a tantrum. You get the kind of looks meant to embarrass you. The kind of looks that make you want to give in to the tantrum just to make the scene stop. No, that's not the kind of look I give- I give the 'yep, mine did that yesterday' look; the 'hold firm mommy!' look.  I love when other moms look at me that way too!

What kind of kid do you have? How do  you struggle to parent well? How do other moms make it harder or easier for you? Let us know!

About Us: Our Home

Wow! It feels like there is so much that I can say about our home. First, let's just get a few things out of the way: Yes, our house was a funeral home; No, we don't hear ghost noises; Yes, it is sort of a mini-mansion (10 bedrooms, 2 living rooms- you get the idea); Yes we are fully aware that our house would at least triple in value if we moved it, oh about 2.5 miles North, or 5 miles South; Yes, we do like it just where it is.

So, with that out of the way, here are the quick WHYs, HOWs and WHOs of it all.

I (Jess) live in this crazy stone Colonial Revival with my husband (Jake) our two children, Mowgli and Pocahontas (more on these aliases later) my parents, two friends and a dog. We made this leap 4 years ago when we realized that we have a deep and compelling need for community that just was not being met by our living situation. We were living in East Germantown then (we are currently in West Our house in the blizzard of 2010Germantown) and my parents were living in the Northeast section of the city. I had a 1 1/2 year old Mowgli in tow and would travel (almost daily) back and forth to their house to get some much needed grown-up time and to let them see their grandson. We were a 7-10 minute drive from our church (which to most people sounds close, but in our church, most members live within walking distance, making for easier relationship building.) One night, the idea came to me that we ought to sell our respective houses and buy a house to live in together with my folks. 6 months later, it was done. We bought this quirky and beautiful stone home right smack on Wayne Avenue- one of the busiest thoroughfares in the neighborhood.

4 years later we are enjoying (and sometimes complaining about) multi-generational family life. We quickly welcomed 2 more people into our home- our dear friends Ana and Heather who complete our ragamuffin group. We are walking distance from our church (though we drive anyway since we have our instruments to schlep!) and we love the community on our block. Our house is not quiet inside our out (Wayne Ave can be loud and so can my kids) it is not always tidy inside or out (Wayne Ave is a trash collector and our big house is a lot of work to clean!). It is not perfect or pristine, or pompous. It's just big, and full- of life, laughter, good smells (and sometimes bad ones, ahem, diaper day!) and great people!

Tell us what makes your home special- where do you find community?

Fallen off the diaper wagon...or any wagon?

This morning I received an email from an old college friend. We live worlds apart- she, in Wisconsin with her kiddos ; me, in Philly with mine. Something she wrote, however reminded me of just how similar our lives, and probably the lives of many moms actually are. She explained that she had been an avid cloth diapering mommy but had fallen off the wagon, so to speak, for a bit. Between the laundry of a large family, the demands of the day and a Target store just around the corner- disposables had been easier lately.

No judgement- I totally get that. In fact, I do not belong to some cloth diaper exclusive society that has a revolving secret password (actually I do, and today it's "fuzzi bunz"; tomorrow, "thirsties"; Friday, "bumgenius")

The point is, however, that she wanted to get back into cloth diapering and today, she got back on the wagon. She mentioned that I inspired her to start up again but the truth is- she inpired me! To get back on the wagon, that is. Which wagon...well I'm not exactly sure yet. I feel like I've fallen off of many wagons lately. Really, there are so many loose carts going around that I feel they could form a whole train and run me down if I let them.

So, I'm getting back on the wagon of, well, looking at my wagons! Then, I'll decide which one to hop back on first.

So, how about you? Which wagon has run away without it's rider in your life? Cloth diapering? Eating healthy? (I've been to Rita's twice this week!), Exercise (haven't seen my step class in months!), Journaling? Prayer? Family time? Budgeting? Yes, Yes Yes...

I'm just going to choose one runaway wagon and work on that, then one more, maybe!

Let us know how you are staying on the wagons in your life- share any tip that make it easier!

Update on Monday, March 29, 2010 by Phillydiaper Team

By the way, lest you misunderstand my point of view...

I am aware that life will be a series of falling of wagons repeatedly. More importantly (and thankfully), it will be a series of getting picked up by grace and the love and help of others. Just tonight, after my post, I had a milkshake... really. So there goes the healthy eating wagon... Oh, but for the grace of God!

Sunshine is your friend!

The Sun is shining today (at least it is here in Philly)- take advantage!

The sun is a wonderful 'natural resource' that moms everywhere need to be reminded to take advantage of. It's great for a number of things:

- Getting over the winter blues. Lots of moms (and dads too) suffer from SAD, or Seasonal Affective Disorder, and know how the winter blues can hit hard and drag on. But even those who don't suffer from this disorder can experience a refreshing and rejuvenating sense of living by just getting out in the sun a little bit. It certainly helps to tackle the rigors of parenthood to have a few moments of "ahhhh" whenever possible.

- Get that Bilirubin level down! Have a newborn who's a little jaundiced*? Lots of doctors reccommend that sunshie works wonders! Too cold? That's ok, snuggle up with baby in a sunny window. Don't forget to strip baby down- down to this cozy cloth diaper that is!

- Get those stains out! Have a few stains on your cloth diapers? (Well this is a cloth diaper blog afterall- we had to get this in somehow!) The sun is one of the most powerful natural bleaching agents around! Hang your cloth diapers on a line outside, or on a rack in front of a sunny window (if you window have UV protection, opening the window can help) and watch the stains disappear before your eyes! All the power of chlorine bleach with none of the damage to your diapers, or harsh effects on the environment or baby's skin.

- Let your kids play in the sun! It's not just adults who get a little, ahem,' cranky when cooped up all day. Has your little one been a litle MORE bonkers and a little LESS responsive (happens in my house plenty!)? Maybe it's time for a good run in the sun to get the wiggles out. Afterwards, sitting down and resting will be a welcomed option!

* This blog is a commentary based on a mother's experience. All medical decisions should be made in consult with your doctor.

It takes a village...

It takes a village to diaper a child! Well, not quite, but it certainly helps to have help. Yesterday, a friend was having trouble finding a sitter for her two children and I was reminded about how unusual my household situation is and grateful I am to have, what essentially amounts to, a small village to share the joys and burdens of life with. We live in a large house containing a total of 6 adults and two children- this is an intentional community. We share the common spaces of the living room, kitchen, dining room and laundry room, try our best to eat meals together several times a week and share the workload of cooking and cleaning as much as possible.

D Day: Diaper Day takes place about twice a week, but there is always something going in the washerEach time I wash diapers, I am reminded of the blessing and responsibility that living in community holds.  As you can imagine, there is A LOT of laundry being done on a regular basis! Because I wash my diaper loads on a heavy duty cycle, the washer can be occupied for several hours when I do laundry. I will often see several laundry baskets full of dirty clothes (not mine) lined up waiting for a turn! It is, I'm sure any would say, a bit of a burden to not be able to wash clothes the instant the need arises, but it also forces compromise and an awareness of the needs of others. Many conversations have been sparked in the laundry room as we treat stains, fold dry clothes, change one another's loads and move the wet piles from the washer to the dryer.

Small glimpses into each other's lives; mundane? Yes. Precious? Absolutely.

How do you find community? Let us know, Post a comment!

Poop happens...

I walked in to my 8 month old son's room after maybe 5-7 minutes of letting him cry. I had been taking a much needed shower, while he napped.  He decided to wake up early- just between the rinse and repeat segment of shampoo directions.  I finished hurriedly, knowing that he was a very mobile child and unsure of what he might get himself into should he figure his way out of the crib (he did liberate himself from the crib just a month later!) As I walked into his room, something hit me… thinking back (it’s 4 years later) I can’t remember if the smell or shock from the sight hit first. There he was, in his crib, cloth diaper mostly off, covered in poop! From his head to his toes, from the sheets to the poopy fingerprints on the walls- it was everywhere. I wanted to laugh and cry all at the same time. My little boy’s clever, inquisitive, impatient (mom get in here and change my diaper or I’ll do it myself!) spirit had won out over my carefully planned ‘me time.’ My first thought was ‘arghhhh!’ my second was ‘what did I do wrong here?’ Was his diaper not on right, did I feed him too many plum bits?

Yes, even the cloth diapering moms, the breastfeeding moms, the organic homemade baby food moms, have moments of realization that it's impossible to be in control of every detail and sometimes, poop happens!

I've got lots of mommy friends and we all have different styles of parenting and making choices for our children. The single most freeing piece of wisdom that I’ve' received (and hopefully have been able to share) is what this post is centered around. While we do the best that we can with what we have, it's impossible for it all to go according to plan and sometimes, the plan needs to change.

The culprit- right around the time of the incidentIt wasn’t long after that poopy incident when I was stopped by a weathered, yet beautiful face in the grocery store. She had been watching me with my son and commented on how alert and alive his eyes were. She gently reminded me that I should enjoy him because he’d grown up in a flash. I can still remember her saying, “the toys and dishes will always be there to be picked up and washed, but he won’t always be taking his first steps.” Her words really struck me- those lines on her face gave them authority.

Four years later, I still think about what she said to me. Her words are especially convicting when dinner’s not done, diapers not washed and there just aren’t enough hours in the day. It helps, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot, to be reminded of what matters.